Toki. Not Dethklok. Just Toki.
THIS IS MY SANTA. K-K-K-YEAH.
MY DEAR FANS FOLLOWERS,
I AMS NOT HAVINGS BEEN ON BECAUSE IT AMS CHRISMUS
AND
I WAS BUYING PRESENTS FOR MY UNGREATFUL, SELFISH, BAD SMELLINGS
BAND.
FUCK THEM.
I GOTS THEM AWESOME GIFTS.
(via die-for-dethklok)
it ams the fucking plagues.
(via crystalfemmes)
- Lawyer: The lyrics clearly state: "Go into the water, go into the water. Live there, die there." Well, my clients all tried to breathe water and nearly died because of this "Underwater Album" by your band, Dethklok.
- Pickles the Drummer: Why don't you... go breathe underwater?
- Lawyer: I suggest that it was your intention to create an album that caused destruction to human life!
- William Murderface: Suggest all you want! It won't make your weenie any bigger, you dildo-licker!
- Lawyer: This band is a danger to the human race!
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: You's a danger of putting us to asleep. I would'a brought a sleepinsbag I knows this guys was gonna show up.
- Lawyer: Your Honour, we DEMAND 50 million dollars for medical bills and punitive damages.
- Toki Wartooth: Hey, how 'bout we compromise...
- Nathan Explosion: We'll give you half... of NOTHING!
- Charles Ofdensen: The album clearly states "Intended for fish only". I rest my case.
- Judge Alfanso: Not guilty!
Here ams five great gifts ideas for when you ams on a budget!
- Wraps a bowl of water and tells dem it ams verys rare snowmans blood
- Takes a box and draws onto its. Puts your head inside and sing when dey opens de box. Bam, musics box. Porfect for de ladies.
- Makes a necklace froms de guitar pick…
“Wraps a bowl of water and tells dem it ams verys rare snowmans blood”
mega br00tal
Oh Toki, I’d date you any day. And don’t worry, we’ll avoid the 15th. oh…uh…um…ah…ja… nots the 15th. nevers the 15th…antiaichan:
why ams all you pretty goils looking for new bee effs?
it’s okay.
toki will gladly goes on dates with pretty goil steff.
:3
notadildos
- Nathan Explosion: Idea for song: Mur... murder... a guy, a guy gets murdered... and eaten... at an all-you-can-eat buffet, yeah...
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Last time I was in Finland... Last time I was in Finland I must have you-know-what-ed about, mmm, five hundred girls.
- Nathan : OH! and that happens forever! Yeah.
- Skwisgaar: Ballspark estimate. Whatever.
- Toki Wartooth: Not like it's so hard. You in the biggest band in the world.
- Skwisgaar: Women have a -
- Toki: Brags about eating lollipops, he works in lollipop factory!
- Skwisgaar: Women have a quality attraction to me. Mmm, you got to deal with it.
- Toki: Oh, I'm dealing with it. Believe me, I'm holding back gallons of throw-up as we speak!
- Skwisgaar: Don't do me any favors, throw up on yourself.
I said this to my mom while we were decorating our tree today. She thought I was retarded and I thought that was very offensive towards people with needs. Gosh mom!
krismus trees
(via antiaichan)
